You've been Royed
by The Evil Obvious
Summary: CURSE THE YAOI! Hahaha, i'm gonna have fangirls after my head for that! Anyways, this is a story i just made about Ed discovering the horrors that fangirls unleash upon this fandom. Poor poor Ed! more crack from me! woo! T for Edwards nasty potty mouth.


**Well i personally dislike yaoi, so if you like it i'd advise to to stop reading this right now. Especially if you are a fan of RoyEd (WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?) *barfs* sorry guys, i can't stand it...it killed me to write one part of this story. Agh i'll be sick for days!**

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Ed glanced around the book selves, looking for any book about alchemy that he had not read. (ha he'll be there for ever!) He sighed when he realized it was probably an impossible task.

He had been in the colonel's personal library for quite some time and had been unable to find anything useful. He took one last look over the shelves when a book suddenly came to his attention that he had not noticed before. He took it out to read the cover but found a sticky note attached to it.

'DO NOT READ FOR YOUR OWN SAFTY!' Ed suddenly became very curious and looked around to see if anyone was watching. He snickered evilly when he realized no one was and opened the book.

On the inside of the cover there was another note.

'I warned you once, this book contains horrors that should not be seen by human eyes.' This just caused Ed to become even more intrigued.

He opened the first page, the title of the chapter was "love in the rain," Ed re-read the title several times before coming to the conclusion that this must be Mustangs secret romance novel. He snickered and proceeded to read.

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Al had been looking for books in another section of the library when heard the most horrific scream he had ever heard. He jumped up and realized it was Ed that was screaming.

"BROTHER?!" Al clunked quickly in his brothers direction, he rounded the book shelf ready to fight but instead of some dangerous intruder he found Ed on his hands and knees with a book open on the floor nearby. It looked as though it had been tossed across the room.

"brother?" Al asked but Ed just sat there looking pale and shaky. His eyes were wide in horror of what he had just read.

Ed looked up at Al, there were tears in his eyes. This made Al worry even more about his brother, Ed never EVER cried.

"Brother! What's wrong?" Al asked softly, trying not to spook Ed anymore than he already was. Ed just pointed at the book. Al went over to the book, expecting it to have some hidden secret like Marcoh's notes about the philosophers stone.

Al read the first paragraph he could see,

'Mustang's eyes were filled with passion for the younger man. _oh Edward, you are so cute. I wish I could tell you how much I love you, but no…that would never work. _Roy was suddenly surprised when Ed started to move closer to him, his lips were coming closer to his and as - ' (*barf's continuously* i'm so sorry you guys!)

Al sat there in utter astonishment.

"brother…what is this?" he asked, his hands were shaking slightly.

"I-I don't know! Ug…I feel sick Al," and then he proceeded to lose his lunch. Al was fairly sure that if he had a stomach he would be doing the exact same thing. What kind of sick person would write something like this?

When Ed had finished visiting his lunch for the second time that day he became very _very _angry.

"WHAT THE HELL!?" he shouted. He picked up the book and stormed out of the room. Al got up hastily and followed his brother.

Ed stormed into Mustang's office his face still pale from shock but now contorted in anger. Everyone in the room turned to look as he came in.

"what's happened now FullMetal?" he asked, his head was resting lazily on his hand.

"WHAT THE HELL IS THE MEANING OF THIS YOU SICK SON OF A BITCH?" Ed roared, everyone had to plug their ears before they bled everywhere. Ed tossed the book onto the table in front of the colonel.

Roy looked down at the book in mild surprise at first, then a smirk started creeping up his face slowly.

"You, FullMetal, have been Royed." Ed proceeded to punch his face into a bloody mess.

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**oh the terrors of yaoi! please review and yes you are aloud to flame. hahaha i know you yaoi lovers are just dying to kill me because of this. HAHAHAHA! eugh well, now i have desplayed my emense dislike for the famous RoyEd pairing.**

**Come on guys! Roy is almost twice Ed's age! i personally have no problem with gay people (as long as they keep there love life to themselves, that goes for straight people as well.) i just can't stand when people make perverted stories about the most inapropriate pairings ever! if the pairing is not evident in the actual manga or novel or show then it just makes me sick. don't even get me started on Elricest AHH! even the word makes me feel sick. incest is something i do have a problem with! IT'S JUST SOOO WRONG! **

**well that was my rant for the day, hopefully i get some good reviews besides those crazy fangirls who want to rip my face off. Toodles!  
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